『老爸的英文情書』

Dear wang litte sister:
From see you one eye, I shit love you.
Your eyes close, I die; your eyes open, I come back to live.
Your eyes close and open again and again,I die again and again.
Maybe you do not remember me, no matter.
When you carefully look at me, you will one see clock.
I think l should introduce myself to you.
I call Li big great. Toyear 25
My home have four mouth people-papa, mama, I and DD.
I am a good man, in a big company work.
I do early fuck every day, so that I can have strong body to protect you.
Please come to eat and sleep with me, or I will cut my hair to be a monk,
and find a place where many monks live in to over my life;

Like Your people

翻譯:

親愛的王小姐
從看到你的第一眼，愛上你。
妳的眼睛閉上；我就死了，你的眼睛打开，我又活过来，妳的眼睛貶啊貶，我就死去活來
也許你不記得我，沒有關係，當你仔細看著我，你就會一見鍾情
我想應該介紹一下自己。
我叫李大偉， 今年 25 （今天是today，那麼今年就是toyear。至於偉就翻成great吧！)
我家有四口人 .. 爸爸、媽媽、我和弟弟。
我是一個好男人，在一家大公司上班。
我每天都做早操，這樣我會有強壯的身體來保護你。
請嫁給我吧 , 否則我將削髮為僧 , 找個廟來了此一生。
( 實在想不起「嫁」字怎麼翻譯，好在頭腦靈光 , 嫁過來不就是和我吃住在一起。至於「廟」字 , 也不會翻譯，不過很多和尚住在一起的地方，就是廟。 )

喜歡妳的人




＊原來做早操的英文是 make early fuck ……